When will I be famous?

I was thrilled that Brian Cranston won the Emmy for best actor in a drama series. Especially as I said I was rooting for him when we met at a party the day before the ceremony. It was plain wrong that he always missed out on ‘best actor in a comedy’ for
Malcolm In The Middle, where he played the dad so brilliantly. His victory was a jewel in an ocean of shit. The ceremony’s opening 12 minutes with the five reality show hosts was possibly the worst television ever seen.

At the same party, I saw my old chum, Matt Goss, who invited Julia and me to his 40th birthday bash. Funnily enough, I recently bumped into Matt’s identical twin, Luke, at LAX when we were dropping Mum and Dad off. I made the mistake of calling him Matt, but he still gave us his email address and said let’s do dinner. By most accounts, Luke was the best thing about Hellboy II. And I saw him in a Cadillac TV ad recently.

I remember interviewing them both for Sky News back in the day, in a helicopter flying them to a Radio One roadshow on Weymouth beach. There have been rumblings in the press about a reunion of the great Bros, the first and, in my opinion, best boy band.
I think my first-ever ‘plus one’ event was going with Julia to their after-show party following a Wembley Arena gig. Or was it Wembley Stadium? Anyhoo, it was at a fab house in Queen’s Gate and my first taste of the high life.

I asked Matt what I should wear to the party. “Something sexy,” he answered. I explained that I don’t do sexy, so we decided I could sit in the corner with his mum. Matt’s fiancée, Daisy Fuentes, is hosting the party. Now she is sexy.

Julia is on a roll right now. This morning she was booked to appear with Vonda Shepherd in a sketch for Tracey Ullman’s State of the Union. And The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson want her to appear in November, date to be confirmed. That’ll be after we fly back from France where we will be playing ourselves in The Making Of Plus One movie.

Tracey has also asked my pal, former top model Debbie Brett, to be in a sketch. I made a bit of a twit of myself when I played Tracey at tennis last week. “How come you’ve asked everyone I know to be in your show except for me?” I said. “Because,” she replied, “you can’t sing. And you’re not five-ten and thin.” Fair point, well made.